After the shootingsâŚthis one covers it. 
Flag raising/lowering = idiotâs delight
What the height of your flag means
By Alexandra Petri
Lowered over the Department of the Interior: Ryan Zinke is not in the office.
Raised over the Department of the Interior: Ryan Zinke is in the office.
Half-staff: I am respectfully observing the passing of Sen. John McCain.
Half-staff, then full, then begrudgingly half again, over the White House: The president doesnât think John McCain was a hero because he got captured (?) and is being mean and petty about it.
Half-staff, then full, then begrudgingly half again: Listen, I understand that superficially this resembles what the president is doing, but I think that an insistence on decorum above all has gotten us where we are today, and I have some thoughts about McCainâs legacy that I would like to raise. Obviously, the reason to criticize McCain is not that he got captured, though.
Half-staff but one of the corners is folded down like a bookmark: I would like to reevaluate the senatorâs legacy at an appropriate time, although in this news cycle, can anything ever be said to be an appropriate time? I donât know. I donât know anything anymore.
Up and down and up and down and up and down, never resting: Flag height is loading.
There is no flag nearby, but instead you respectfully display wall-to-wall coverage of the flagâs position, although you cannot shake the feeling that there must be other things happening in the world: Something in our news is deeply broken.
Half-staff but a picture of Sarah Palin has been taped to the flag: I wish to respectfully observe the passing of John McCain, but also I have a point to make.
Flag is taken off pole altogether and folded and placed into a box and stared at for a long time: Someone who sought to hold our politics to a higher standard is gone. It is possible to mourn that higher standard and regret what has filled the void while still pointing out that his vision of a world and an America worth protecting at times did not include everyone, and that this had consequences.
Flag is a jolly roger: Pirates have taken control of the building.
Flag replaced with single-spaced text on a white background that says âHis Rebuke to That Lady in the Red Shirt in 2008 Was a Heroic Moment Worth Celebrating (Though It Too Was Insufficient) But Sadly Few People in His Party Could Have Done What He Did (Although I Wish He Had Added That It Was Possible to Be the Ominously Vague Other, the âArab,â That She Insinuated and Still Be a True American)â: Pretty much what it says on the flag.
Half-staff, then full, then half again, then all the way down, then back to half: Help, I am stuck inside the flag-lowering and flag-raising mechanism.
Five-eighths-staff: I understand that now is the time to show reverence for the passing of a statesman. However, after watching what felt like a six-hour documentary that underscored every good action the senator ever took with stirring music and that had clearly been prepared months in advance, I am mildly annoyed and unsure how to show it without being disrespectful.
Flag is lowered, then raised, then lowered again: I salute your passing vessel.
Flag is replaced with one that is all white with one blue and one red stripe: Donald Trump was given this flag to color.
Satire from The Borowitz Report
Mueller Rents Giant Warehouse to Store Evidence Against Trump
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)âRobert Mueller is renting a massive warehouse facility in suburban Virginia to accommodate the approximately forty cubic tons of evidence against Donald Trump that the independent counselâs investigation is generating on a daily basis.
Employing over two thousand workers in a warehouse the size of seven football fields, the Mueller investigation has become the fastest-growing sector of the U.S. economy, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.
Working twelve-hour shifts, the members of Muellerâs evidence-storage team rarely leave the warehouse, where the punishing task of filing mountains of evidence against Trump proceeds around the clock.
âItâs like a city all its own,â one warehouse worker said. âThere are people working in the Michael Flynn section whoâve never met the people working in the Paul Manafort section.â
While the warehouse workers are well paid, there have been issues with burnout. âThe team in charge of filing all of Donald Trump, Jr.,âs different explanations of his meeting with the Russians had to take time off,â one worker said.
As gargantuan as the storage space appears to be, an aide to Mueller said that the investigation would soon be seeking a second, even larger warehouse. âWe need a place to put all the Jared stuff,â the aide said.
Humor
From Elizabeth Cronise Joan McLaughlin
Who needs a laugh this afternoon? Google âimbecile.â Go on. Do it.
Michael Cohen and Paul Manafort share a cell | Lovett or Leave It
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=390&v=0WrMDXqFWas
New section of the bible - Hypocrites 23:69
@MollyJongFast
Molly Jong-Fast Retweeted Marco Rubio
âThou shall be mad at a movie but not discuss anything substantive because thou art afraid of angering the manchurian President.â
Hypocrites 23:69Marco Rubio
âVerified account @marcorubioMarco Rubio Retweeted Business Insider
This is total lunacy. And a disservice at a time when our people need reminders of what we can achieve when we work together. The American people paid for that mission,on rockets built by Americans,with American technology & carrying American astronauts. It wasnât a UN mission.